Q. I was relieved to read the Wall Street Journal column about office romances. “Relieved” because an agency co-worker and I have been secretly dating for nearly a year. My parents advised us to hide the fact we’re dating since someone in my dad’s office was fired for dating a co-worker. I’m thinking that we’re being overly sensitive? -MK
A. Knowing what I do about agency grapevines, I’m sure your office already knows about your relationship. I don’t see a problem as long as you don’t date a subordinate or your boss. That would make for a difficult situation for you and your co-workers. Ideally, dating colleagues should work on separate project teams, but that’s not always possible in smaller offices. Unless your agency has a policy prohibiting dating co-workers, there’s no reason to observe “don’t ask, don’t tell.”
I have been dating a guy I met at work for a year. Our company has the same policy that you can date co-workers but not bosses. Everyone told us to keep our relationship a secret even though there was nothing wrong with it. In the end, we both ended up transferring to different branches, not because of stress or complications, but because neither of us could be promoted while in the relationship. In order to advance, we could not continue to see each other. While nothing may be wrong with your current situation, if you hope to climb the ladder, I advise you to keep it a serious secret.